It’s really embarrassing for me to write this. But I have been emotionally GORGING on food all day.
It’s really embarrassing because just the day before I posted about how awesome it is to be home and experience every one of Narra’s frustrations and victories.
But this morning it was just too much. Too too much. Too much crying. Too much pulling. Too much tugging at me. Too much THREE YEAR OLD. And I was just too much TIRED.
And if it weren’t for a friendly neighbour-turned-family who stopped by (thank you June) and gave me a hug and let me feel SAFE enough to just let my tears fall…
If it weren’t for my actual family (thank you Sherri and Oliver) for taking us out on an adventure today so I wouldn’t have to be alone again with Narra’s crying…
If it weren’t for my best friend (looking at you Amie) checking in on me and I on her and just laughing on the phone about husband hilarities for the brief 10 minutes of alone time I got today while Narra watched TV…
If it weren’t for the challengers and friends I got to check in with (Kate, Shley and Jessica) who are in this with me, who are ready, willing and PSYCHED to be coached…
I might’ve just emotionally eaten the WHOLE goshdarn house.
I don’t always know where I’m going. I don’t always know what I’m doing. But for the hour I am doing my workout, the hour I am FORCED for my OWN GOOD to do something for me because of COACHING, for the minutes I check into my groups and post my sweaty selfies, my mind is clear. I am SAFE. I feel LOVED above all else by the person who makes all the SH!T happen: Me.
So today, despite my relapse back into emotional eating, I recognize myself for being a great coach, mother, and WOMAN today. For sharing my imperfections and exhaustions with motherhood and life, for not being afraid to ASK FOR HELP and let myself cry and show my vulnerabilities.
There is a lesson in every moment of chaos and calamity. And the lesson here: It’s okay to not be okay. A shitty day does not make a shitty life. I know this because the sun will come out tomorrow. It always does.
And people ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS are ready to help if you just ask.
So lady, if you’re suffering in silence and you’re waiting for someone to reach out and ask you if you need help, summon up the brave badass ovary power I know you have and REACH OUT. You got this girl.
Help, LOVE and energy is always available to those who ASK.
I’m here for you and I’m ready to help. Just ask.